Letters to Abigail Houston Shedd
These letters were written to Abigail Houston between 1830 and 1845, spanning the time when she lived in New Hampshire to shortly after she moved to Iowa and married George Shedd. Many of the letters are from Maria Lovejoy Needham, who appeared to have been a very close friend. One of these is a letter from shortly before Abigail moved west, and expresses her despair at likely never seeing her friend again. Maria was identified as the author of these letters by the mention of her son, Herbert Alsavan, born June 16, 1845.
Wilton Feb 8th 1830
Dear Abbie agreeable to your request and my own inclination I devote a few moments in writing to you although I have nothing interesting to write. My health has not been as good as usual for a fortnight past. I have got most beat out. Mother was taken sick the next week after I came home. She was sick a fortnight. Was very sick 2 days. Since that the children have all been sick with the measles. They have been out of their room today for the first time since they were sick. I have not had the measles yet but expect to have to have them this week. I have not been about much since I came up. I spent 1 week with my Brother at Dublin. Have not been to Temple to stop long. I went to see Aunt Mary and spent an half a day. She appears to enjoy herself pretty well. She inquired for your health said she should like to see you.
I have been to meeting last 2 Sabbaths since I came home and 2 week days. We do not have any week day meetings now at all nor Sabbath eves. We have no Minister now but are in hopes to have one soon. They of trying to get Mr. Everet the one that formerly preached at Milford. I feel as though we needed a good Minister. It is a very dull time in our society now. I think never were the church so stupid and so little engaged in religion as they are now. I often think of the meetings at Lowell and wish I could be there. I miss the Sabbath school very much. We don't have one here this winter. They have got through with their question books and thought it best not to have any this winter as they have no minister. I feel as though there was more need of having one if we have no Minister.
I hope my dear friend you are living for God and letting your light shine before the world that others may led by your example to the Savior. Do you enjoy the presence of God are you daily asking him what he would have you do if we have been redeemed by the ? of Christ we are not our own therefore let us glorify God in our bodies & sprirts which are his think what our redemption cost what gratitude we owe to God for redeeming love & know we can manifest it best by trying to bring others to the same fountain of living waters ? prayer as it is our highest priviledge & our ideas delight. May we abide in Christ as the life of our souls and the foundation of our hopes while we trust in his death may we emulate his life and by consistent holiness adorn the gospel we profess. I intended to have written my but my health will not admit. Please to write a long letter as soon you get this girl my love to Aunt L & L Howard and all inquiring friends.
Yours affectionately H Mason
Litchfield Jan. 19, 1834
Absent friend
If time and health will permit me I shall endeavor to fulfil my engagement which I made to you before we parted from Derry. Through negligent that I have not wrote to you before, therefore I hope that you will excuse me.
I have enjoyed tolerable good health since the close of the school, and I hope these few lines will find you enjoying the same blessing. I was in Derry about three weeks ago and made a short visit at the Greggs. It did seem very natural. I presume it would been more so if all the boarders had been there. Those were at home was well excepting Melvina. The other two girls I presume you have seen them since I have. Mrs. Gregg told me that Miss Washburn was assistant in Ipswich school and they did not expect her next summer. I should admire to see her and all the other teachers.
I was in Lowell the next day after you left me at Derry to tend a wedding, that was before you arrived there I expect, and, did see Rev. Mr. Twining marry them, and I was very much pleased with him. Rev. Mr. Blanchard has preach in this town few weeks ago and was like very well. I often think what good privilege we had while we was going to school to attend to religious instructions. If we did not attend to it the fault must fall upon us, for Miss Washburn done her duty and gave us time I think sufficient enough.
You must give my best respect to Laura and tell her I should be happy to receive a letter from her, and also Elizabeth send her best respect to you and L. and requested me to tell both of you to write as soon as you can make it convenient. E is absent from home most of the time she works at her trade and is very much hurried.
I presume you are drove at your trade. I shall expect a long letter from you now as soon you receive this. I should be happy to see each of you and to have a socialable chit chat. If it would be agreeable to you I should like to correspond with you frequently and also to your sister. You must excuse bad writing and all mistakes there is in this letter. It is not so difficult task to write now what it was when we went to school for we can speak when we please to and to whom we please. O do write as soon as possible,
Your affectionate friend,
Julia Ann Bixby
The cold winter has come,
And half of it has gone.
The time passeth away,
While we are sleeping on.
Lyndeborough Nov. 4 1837
Beloved Friend
We received your letter by the hand of Uncle Goodridge, directed to sister Lucy a short time previous to this, and as she is at Hancock attending public school, we immediately transmitted it to her. I have received a letter from her requesting me to write an excuse to you for not ansering your very friendly letter, which is so well worthy of an answer, and humbly to apologize for neglecting one so worthy as yourself. She wishes me to say to you, expressing her gratitude for your kind invitation to spend the winter with you, that it would be pleasant if her health was sufficient she writes she has been detained from school by sickness. While at H nearly a week confined to her chamber but she has now recovered so that she attends school, says it is interesting and the teeacher possessing superior qualifications which renders it profitable. Sister Margery and Phebe attend likewise. They will return in about two weeks. Sister L. will then write you according to her promise. Sends her best respects to Miss Annabel for her kindness and likewise to you. I must now lose this hasty scribble fearing you will not read half I have written as Uncle will leave for Lowell sooner than I exected. I have been obliged to sit down and scribble as fast as I could without any regard to penmanship or style of composition. You would like to hear all that regards news I suppose. As it respects the course of religion I must tell you with deep regret there is nothing of interest. Mr. White has been sick and unable to preach for two sabbaths. You have doubtless heard of Benjamin Clarks return to L. He has supplied the pulpit is liked very well. His return was very unexpected to his friends. He will spend the winter in L. Our new Meeting house is nearly completed. It will be dedicated in the course of two or three weeks. I must now stop writing for the bearer is waiting. Give my best respects to your sisters and all your fathers family. Sarah sends much love. You will not deem this scrawl worthy an answer but hope you will pardon me and do write me a long letter as it would be gratifying to me in the superlative degree. Had I time should not leave so much blank paper, and would gladly fill this sheet your candour will therefore excuse.
From your affectionate friend,
Lois Goodridge
Milford, Dec 7, 1837
My Dear friend Abby-
Thanksgiving day Eve. I presume Abby has said again, and again, how negligent, or indifferent, Maria has grown about writing. But I assure you it is not so, it has been only for want of time, but it is with great pleasure that I now have a few moments to devote in writing to my Dear friend. My time has been wholly occupied for many weeks. I have been very much hurried with work, this fall, and am so yet, it seems sometimes as though they would pull me in pieces, one wants me and another wants me, we have not been to the shop since Mother's Death, we take work to the house, and I have been out to work some. I should not have thought one year ago that I could have done it, but I find that I have to do many things which at the first thought would seem almost impossible. I have often thought could we foresee what we are to pass through, we should be very miserable indeed. No doubt it is from very wise purposes that it is concealed from us, our trust ? present, has assurred no that our strength shall be made equal to our days, very often we see this promise verified, to weak, and frail ?! This Thanksgiving day has been rather a lonely one to us, we seem to have enough to make us happy, and much to be grateful for, but our Deat Mother is not with us, this is was casts a gloom upon every thing around us. But then why should it? We feel her loss very sensibly, more and more, from day to day, and very much do we feel the need of his society again but we know it cannot be, as shall never again behold her smiling countenace, nor hear her lovely vide. But than I think again she is far happier than she could be here. This is all that consoles me. She left an evidence that her departure was with peace, and this is indeed cheering to us all. She has given me (and all the rest of us) a great deal of instruction, and good counsle. I hope and trust it will not all be in vain. I know for one, I can never forget it.
She has been a Dear, and kind Mother to us all, and could we have her again I think I should apprize her more highly than ever. But God saw fit in his wise prudence to remove her from us, and I hope I can say from the heart, and feel that it is perfectly right, and just, and it is in mercy that he has done it.
I know we need his chastisements, and we have reason to expect that if his goodness, and mercies, do not lead us to repentance he will come with his rod, to correct us, his unfit, erring children. How proin (?) I am to wander from him the best of friends, and the only true friend, one who has promised never to leave us forsake us if we will be trust in him. I have thought today how very different the employment of my Dear Mother from what it ever was on such days before, today we trust she is praising God in heaven, and not in his earthly temple. Who of us before the return of another day like this will be in the silent graves? It may be me, or it may be you. God only knows, we are clearly admonished to be also ready. He has come very near to you, as well as to me, and left these loved little sister babe, at home. We find it a great care, but when I think it is a little Motherless creature, I feel willing to do any thing for it, I remember that I had a dear Mother to watch over me in my infancy.
Little Emma sleeps between sister & I, you cannot think what a warm little bedfellow she is. If she would lay peaceably the night it would be good, but when she says the word we have to get up and get her milk, and after she gets what she wants she will lay down and go to sleep very soon. I did not think one year ago, when I was sleeping with Miss H. that I should have a little babe to sleep with this winter, but so it is, strange as it seems. I have much to say to you, could I see you, but have not time to write much more this time. I hope you will write to me soon. I want to hear from you very much, do not take a pattern by myself. Say to Harriet if you please, that I intend to write to her soon, it is not because I have forgotten her that I have not written before this. Please to remind Miss Field that a letter fro her would be very acceptable indeed. Give much love to your mother, and sisters, and all of the family, and likewise to Miss H, and Harriet, Miss Proctor, and to all inquiring friends. I want to see you all very much and more than ever before, but don’t expect you will take the trouble to come and see me perhaps never.
Eliza joins with me in love to all. I hope she will visit Lowell at Christmas, and think now she will. She wants to very much. Will you not remember your unworthy friends at the throne of grace. Do write us soon as convenient. I fear you will be troubled to read this, for I was obliged to write very hastily.
From your unworthy friend,
Maria L.
Milford Sept. 3, 1841
Dear Sisters,
Agreeable to your request I seat myself to pen you a few lines. Having so much business on hand I hardly know how to take the time. Perhaps you would like to here respecting prosperity. Considering the time you cannot expect every particular upon one sheet of paper. I arrived safely in N… about 13 o’clock, stopped at the Mills, found them well. Did not see Mrs. M. until evening. She was visiting with Mrs. Bullard (?) and her daughters at Brother John’s. I spend the afternoon at the shop with the Misses Lancasters. It seems quite like home and as though I must say, my shop, but I have no desire to call it so again. Yesterday fore noon I spend with Brother Mills and Helen. In the afternoon went to the shop, and also called attain to see Mr. Lovejoy. Found that a precious little time to sew besides all the talking I had to do, and occasions by looking at the Soldiers. Last we called with the Misses L. at Dea. Knight’s. Found Mrs. K. not very well. They expect st start on their journey next Monday. Spent the night at Mr. Mills. I spent this day with the Misses L. We are having a very good time. No company as yet to interrupt us. “They say I wish Sister E was here.” It seems as thought I should never get my dress done.
I have consulted the Misses L. respecting going to Lowell, but at last have decided they cannot go. Although they would like very much to if it was possible. The only reason is they feel it their duty to assist their Mother and think they can better do it by staying here. They now think. (Lydia says tell E. that Robert Fuller is just passing. He has not got married yet.) (I will just remark that he is a minister. Sister Abby shall I speak a good word.) of going into the mill to work awhile and board with their Mother. If Miss Morison would pay her board they could get along very well, and then they would gladly go to L. I shall not urge them to go for I think they know their own business best, although I should be very glad to have them go.
Well sister how do you prosper. Perhaps you find it rather difficult to get along without my assistance, but I hope you will try and do the best you can, only think how soon. Three week will pass away and then I shall probably be with you again. The stage has just come and no Harriet. I suppose she is at C. before this time. Please tell Brother J. I have some stories about him he did not tell, such as I should little thought of. I cannot stop to relate them now. Neither can I stop to write you a long letter, and you know I did not promise to. I suppose a sheet of blank paper, folded in the form of a letter would be worth a four-pence to Abby.
Please give my love to all inquiring friends. All send best to you. Thus far I have enjoyed my visit well. I shall expect a letter when most convenient. I entrust of you to be good children. Has friend L. returned? Please excuse this scribble. I need not tell you I write in haste.
Yours affectionately Maria L.
Temple Jan 3, 1842
Dear Friend Abby,
I heartily wish you a happy new year – but in what does true happiness consist. Does it spring from earth or earthly pleasures, which are so transitory and fading? Ah, there is nothing here that can satisfy the desires of an immortal mind that spark which will live when these heavenly lights shall be extinguished, and there elements meted with fervent heat. Nothing short of God can satisfy.
"What nothing earthly gives or can destroy,
The souls calm sunshine, and the heartfelt joy."
When we are walking by faith, and not by right, doing the will of God, casting ourselves upon our Covenant, keeping Redeemer then we are happy whatever be our condition. Why will we drink at the puny rills of earthly pleasure, when there is such a fountain of living water opened, of which, if we drink we shall never thirst.
Another year of our short lives has rolled away and what has it borne to heaven, does it tell of duties performed, of fervent prayer that have gone up in behalf of a dying world, of souls saved through our instrumentality. I can only say I have been an unfruitful cumberer of the ground, and would long ere this been cut down, but not mercy cryed spare a little longer. Where shall we flee but to the atoning blood of Christ, which cleanseth from all in to Him we can go for pardon, for sanctification. He sitteth at the right hand of God to make intermission for us that he may complete our redemption. Could and should a friend do for us what Christ has done should we treat them so coldly as we do the Saviour, should we not often speak of their goodness.
How can we lie in sluggish still,
And never act our part,
Come Holy Dove from the heavenly hills,
And sit and warm our hearts.
Yesterday I seemed to see that beloved church partaking of the dying emblems of our departed Lord. I longed to be with them, it is a year since I have been permitted that privilege, could I hear one more sermon, I think I could go in the strength of it many days.
As to my health it is pretty good but my back does not gain much. I cannot stand or walk around without suffering the consequences, I think now I shall return to Lowell about the middle of Feb, for if I wait till spring I think I could not bear the ride so well as I shall this winter by sleighing. I dread the journey for it probably will lay me down a few days, it will not seem like home to board out, but I shall not keep house again till I am better able to have charge of work than I was before. I gave up last year, had I left work early in the fall, I probably should saved some suffering. I have not yet forgotten how miserably I felt Christmas afternoon and the next day.
Can I get back comfortably I can do considerable sewing enough to pay my way. I wish you to send me word what I am owing and I will collect money enough to pay when I return. I suppose you find work rather dull. If so you must dismiss all of the help that is not needed, and if you wish for time you must take it. M mentioned going to Milford this winter if work is dull she can as well go as not and stay longer than Mr. N. if she wishes. If you are at home E can take the work by the piece. It seems that Mrs. H. is not what you supposed last summer by her ?? to L. If Lydia wishes to know what she shall pay she may pay for the wood she burnt and work as much for me as she hindered M. If M. took full pay of me, these little possibilities teach us that there is no perfection here in this soil. Mrs. Wyman came the nearest to it of anyone than I have lived with, but such women are scarce. You need not take the visiter nor papers for me, if I am able to work I shall take some other papers.
I am now at my Mothers, have been here nearly a week. I have spent two days with Sister Mary, thought best not to say any longer now. Brother Edward is writing us now it is twenty years since I had seen him. You may well suppose that we were a little overjoyed at his arrival. He feels so anxious about his children that we should not keep him long. He left them with his housekeeper. Mother and Sully send their respects. I can see Mother fails. She gets tired easy. S. is feeble yet. Though she does considerable work she makes herself more unwell every time we have company. I do not enjoy a visit with Mother as I should if I could assist her about her work. You need not wonder at the mistakes for there has been a number of little chatters round me. Emeline is attending school. I have not heard from you since Mr. L. was at L. Write soon. I feel anxious to hear from you. I have heard it was sickly at L. Tell M I was much obliged for her letters. If I should not be able to come back so soon as Feb. I will write again. Say to the girls I shall have to take lodging from one of them when I return. My subjects are numerous, but I shall have more to say when I see you and many inquiries to make.
I want to see you and all of my good friends in L but I dread the return. Give my love to your parents and family, to the ladies at the shop, and all inquiring friends. Don’t expose this jumble.
Yours in sincerity,
L. H.
Milford
Wed eve. May 01
Much loved friend & sister
I now make the third attempt to pen you a few words. As there was not much probability of my conversing with you personally at present, I intended to write you a long letter, but have had so much to occupy my time this week & it will not be possible. Monday after washing I was quite tired. Tuesday I was also quite busy in the forenoon. And the afternoon Father, Sister Emma, Annette came. Today I have been out with Sister A. as much as I could. She has gone to spend the night with Janethe (?) and tomorrow expect to go to L. so I shall have but a short time to write. A. is at work to the mill this eve. I though[t] I should have a good time to write, but have had callers all this eve. Brother N and his Lady has just gone out.
I received your letter on Saturday last. I was very much surprised to hear you say that you had at length decided to go west, but a short time before was rejoicing to think you had decided not to go. I must say that I cannot feel reconciled to the though[t] of you going, especially without my seeing you face to face once more. We cannot possibly leave at this time. My husband cannot very well leave his work and Sister H. is not able to do my work. She thinks of going home with Father this week if she is able to go. She feels rather poorly too much. I think Sister E. will stay with me a few weeks and go to school.
I know not what to say to you. I have so much I should like to say to you. Is it possible we shall never in this world spend no more pleasant hours together? But think for a moment that this is not our home, and it seems but a stop as it were between us and Eternity. O dear Abby let us so live that we may die in peace, and spend a blissful eternity together. Do you not feel it quite a task to get ready for a start? What will Miss H. do without her right-hand man?
Friday Morn. Dear Sis - Again I seat myself to pen you a few lines. I am here alone, with Emma once more. I have not yet had time to think what to do or say. Father and H. has just started for Poplin. I felt very sorry to have her leave M but thought it would be for her benefit as she is so unwell. I sometimes fear if her cough does not get better soon it never will. I presume you would ask how I like housekeeping? I can say very well, and think I shall still better, when I get more settled.
I cannot realize that you are at this time busily engaged in making preparations to leave L. I cannot express to how much I want to see you. O, for one hour to hold, converse personally with you, if no more. Is it possible I shall not see you again for a long time if ever? I want very much to see all of your Fathers family very much. I must of course feel more strongly attached to you, as we have worked so long and so pleasantly together. O I can never forget the pleasant hours I have spent with you. I only have to regret that many of them were not spent more profitably, but the past we can never recall. You are going where you will probably have an opportunity of doing much. I doubt not but you will have a heart to do all in your power towards building up the redeemer’s kingdom. O if we could fully realize the value of one soul, how anxious should we feel to do all we could to save precious souls.
I feel as though you would as a family be very useful at the west. To be sure we can all do good in any place of situation if we desire to. But it sometimes seems as though there was more in some parts of the west than here. How rejoiced your sisters will feel if you all arrive there in safety and I hope it will indeed be so with you. I presume it will be quite a trial for you to part with friends, and those will not be few in number. Mr. Burnham would like to call and bid you good-bye and would if he had known that you thought of going when he was down to L. I should think if he had any conscience it would reprove him for doing just & as he has in some respects. I don’t believe but what he would like to see you especially if he could command courage sufficient. I hope you will write me soon as you can conveniently after you arrive there. I should like to hear how you like and what your prospects are. I presume almost the first news will be Abby is married. You will tell me when there is a prospect of it, will you not?
My health is quite good, much better than it was last summer. I hope this will find you enjoying the same great blessing. I must close although I have not said half I should like to. I truly hope the blessing of God will attend you all while on your journey to the west, and through the short journey of life. May we all so live that at last enjoy the unspeakable happiness of meeting at the right hand of God to praise redeeming love through all Eternity. You will please give much love to all your Father’s family, and accept much from your unworthy friend Maria. Mr. N. joins in the same request and Janetta also. She has just stopped to see me. Mother would say the same if she knew I was writing you. Will you excuse this scribble. I was obliged to write in haste. I should like to give you one kiss and a good shake of the hand ere you go. I cannot. Will you not take the will for the deed?
Farewell dear Abby.
Maria
Wilton, Dec. 10
My very dear Friend,
I think I mentioned in my last letter that you might expect another in the course of the summer. That has now passed, and part of Autumn. Until now I have seen no convenient opportunity for writing to you. My time during the past summer has been very differently occupied from what it was ever before has been. You recollect we used to think it hard to work at dress-making all summer, but now I think it was quite easy to what I have to do last summer. I think I now know something about being sick. I have not been to meeting since last Feb. until last Sabbath, to think of it, would seem a long time to stay at home, but it has passed rapidly away. I think I shall now more highly appreciate the privilege of meeting to worship with the people of God than ever before. I did not hear Mr. Whiting preach last Sabbath. We had a minister from Greenfield today. I have not attended meeting this morning. There was a funeral of a young lady at the Baptist house. She died of the Typhus fever in Nashua. That fever prevails to a considerable extent in this vicinity. Three interesting little girls have died during the past year in this little village, and three little boys and one girl have been added to our numbers. Perhaps you may be somewhat impressed if I tell you my little one is almost six months. Should you ask why I have not written in this, I must answer that it is negligence in part. Last summer I did not feel able, such a task as it then seemed to be and since that time I have had a plenty of business to occupy all of my time.
My babe was born the 16th of June. I was quite sick at the time, but got along comfortable for two or three weeks and then I suppose I took a little cold and it went to my breast. A sorry time I had I assure you, until after I had it opened, then I began slowly to regain my health for three or four weeks, and I thought my terribles were all over, but not so. It gathered again and I had a worse time than before if possible. It seemed so at last. I have had no nourishment in that breast since.
In three months, I was able to ride to Milford, and spent about a week. Since that, my health has been tolerable good. For the most part of the time, I have been somewhat troubled with the erysipelas (?). Sister H came the first of last June, thinking of spending the summer with me, which she did, and is still with me. I do not think I could have done my work alone. At least so long as we had a hired man to board, I expect she will remain through the winter. I feel as though I should be quite lonely without her company, although I have a lovely little boy to occupy my attention. Would not Sister Abby like to stop in and see her little nephew? Perhaps by this time you could take your little one with you. I should like very much to hear how you have prospered since you commenced the married life. I shall expect to hear from you as soon as convenient after you receive this. Sister E mentioned she should be very happy to receive a letter from you. She still remains in Boston. She came the last of summer and spent a few weeks with us. Uncle & Aunt Fletcher visited us about that time.
Brothers W & C are yet at Cambridge. Brother J in Lowell. They have given up house-keeping for this winter and board with Mother Jones, I rather mistrust. Harriet wears a short apron this winter but cannot learn for certainty whether it is so or not. The last time they wrote to us they thought they should visit us this winter. She was confined last March but her child was not living at the time.
She was quite unwell for some time. She had a sore breast, which was five or six weeks in gathering. They thought hers was occasioned by humors (?) as was probably a benefit to her health.
I expect Father will move to Nashville soon. He has bought a house there. I expect sister Annette spends the winter at Father’s. I have no news from Lowell to write you. Probably you have friends there that write often to you. Miss H. visited Temple in the fall but did not call and make me a visit. I was very sorry indeed. She was not at home only about two weeks and her Brother Martin was sick at the time. She spent all of the time with him she possibly could. Sister H. was at the West Village not long since she made Mrs. Stanly a visit. Her little boy is hearty two years. The probability is that she will have more family soon. We have named our little boy Herbert Alsavan. He is a playful little fellow as ever I saw & sometimes fear I love him to well, but try to feel that he is only a lent blessing, not our own. I feel as though we needed much of the grace of God to do by him as we ought. A great responsibility to have even one precious soul omitted to our care.
As it regards the state of religion in this vicinity, I have heard of nothing interesting to write you. How long the present state of things will remain I know not. But for one I feel that it is high time for Christians to be up and doing. While the day last for the night of death will soon overtake us. I feel that I have for a long time been in the same condition. I sometimes wonder I can live on so from day to day when I know such important interests are at stake.
I shall expect to hear from you soon. I presume you have more leisure time than I now have and do not wait for me to write but let me hear from you every opportunity and who your Father’s family. I presume Sarah and Zerphiah are married long before this & perhaps Mary Jane, as girls are in such great demand in that part of the country. I should be very happy to see and converse with you once more face to face but should we not be permitted to enjoy that privilege, may we so here that we may meet in a better world and spend eternity in praising redeeming love. Will you please remember me to your parents, brothers & sisters. Also your husband. My husband joins with me in the same request. Will you please excuse all imperfections, will receive this with much love from you sister Maria.
Sister H wishes to be remembered to you.
